Sunday 5 November 2017

Shaw Lane 1-3 Mansfield Town, Saturday 4th November 2017

Shaw Lane 1-3 Mansfield Town, FA Cup 1st Round (att. 1,700)

Welcome to .....

Having followed local Barnsley side Shaw Lane’s cup exploits from afar, my fellow Londontykes and I waited with baited breath for the draw to the 1st round; a home affair and we could possibly attend. It would, we concurred, be switched to Oakwell and probably played on the Sunday, the day after the Super Reds played host to Birmingham. How wrong we were.

The home of Shaw Lane AFC too!

Shaw Lane were indeed drawn out the hat 1st, to play Mansfield Town, only it would be held at Sheerian Park (‘San Sheerian’), a local ground heretofore devoid of segregation. Good on ‘em! Even better, it was to be picked for television by Sky Sports, kick-off 12:30 on the Satdy. Hang on a minute. When does our train from London get into Barnsley? 11:30. Perfick. Let’s go.

'Courthouse Reds'...later seen at Oakwell.

Sniffer (a former Londontyke now living back in Barnsley) procured us the tickets. And from a Barnsley perspective, it was a tasty looking proposition; Mansfield were potentially fielding 4 ex-Reds: Danny Rose, a diminutive yet lively centre forward who we thought had potential, Paul Digby, a laidback ball-playing midfielder, who we thought had potential, Kane Hemmings, a forward from Scotland who scored bags of goals (showing how poor Scottish football is) and Jacob ‘ba5tard f***ing’ Mellis, one of our least favourite players of recent years. And nevermind his footballing efforts, even the mark of the man is tainted….slipping out of Oakwell quietly one time, rather than take his place in the Exec lounge to receive his MOTM award, despite being reminded several times. He had a players’ Christmas party to attend in Manchester. Wan*er.

Behind the (home) goal.

At Barnsley bus station, we managed to miss one bus to Athersley North, as a Birmingham fan asked for directions to Wetherspoons. Still, they were every 10 mins, and we boarded for the Barnsley borders. I’ve gotta say, I’m pleased I wasn’t on my own. What a mission. Up hill and down dale, before scraping through council estates on the edge of town and being told we were getting off here. I hadn’t seen hide nor hare of the ground yet. The lack of floodlights didn’t help. (Another reason why Sky switched it to 12:30?)

The teams line up.

We were due to meet another member of our party at the stadium, he having dropped his family at home after returning from New York (the life!) and jumping into a taxi. Me? I needed a p***. Those Franziskaner on the train up were starting to take effect. Thus, I was able to see the teams come out and a man dressed up as a giant duck. Shaw Lane (née ‘Shaw Lane Aquaforce’) are sponsored by a Sheffield Wednesday supporting owner of a local plumbing firm, who, far from the romantic image foisted on the nation this week, have been bankrolled through the divisions and now lie one division off the national league (north). How much money can a local plumber have?

Hi Ducky! (Possibly not his real name)

They share the ground with landlords, Athersley Rec (amateurs in the purest sense); Shaw Lane, home of Barnsley cricket and rugby is not considered scratch enough for the level they now compete. So we have the entrance on one corner. There’s a small covered paddock on the left touchline, as you enter. And for one day only, some scaffolding with seats and tables for tables for laptops. Let’s hope it does rain today – the press will have a mare. To the right as you enter is a one storey building housing the Athersley Rec club shop (they have one???) before a small covered section of seating behind the goal. Aside from the temporary open stand at the other end, housing the visitors, this was the only seating. Meantime, the other touchline had no terrace at all. Either lean against the advertising hoardings, or stand atop the scaffolding with the cameraman. No expense spared for Sky.

The media pack.

A healthy crowd of 1,700 had shown up, or more than 10 times Shaw Lane’s average crowd. Decent vantage points were thin on the ground, as folk crowded around the edge of the pitch, so we took a pitch at the far end, towards the Mansfield fans, most of whom were perched on temporary seating set up just for the game. Needless to say, Barnsley folk are never slow in coming forward when faced by teams from former mining colonies perceived to have let down the ’84 Miners’ Strike. ‘Scabs Scabs Scabs’ was met with ‘You’ll never work again’ from Mansfield. All good fun! And yours truly was able to tell Mellis he’d reached his level…before being corrected: ‘He’s still finding his level’. Yes, there’s still a few rungs he can fall, the former million pound footballer (Sheff Utd to Chelsea as a kid). A classic case of ‘too much too young’ he was one of the laziest footballers I have ever seen don the red of Barnsley FC. (I presume someone else put it on for him.)

Presumably a Sky drone, capturing the action.

Shaw Lane (number of ‘homegrown’ footballers: one – former Barnsley fullback Neil Austin) took a few minutes to get into it, but grew in confidence and went in creditably level at half time, one-all. Mansfield took the lead when a well worked move ended with a cross deflected into the path of Pearce, for a relatively easy finish, while Shaw Lane equalised when Bennett hit home a rebound.

Time to celebrate!

Half time came and I was starting to get the nibbles. Normally, I’d be heading for fish and chips pre-match, but as we were facing a dash to Oakwell after this game, that wasn’t an option. A couple of us gave it 5 mins in the 2nd half before we went hunting food. And what glory awaited! Pie and (mushy) peas, plus gravy, £2.50 all in. Bargain. Though it came at a price: a cheer went up. Sounded like a Mansfield goal to me. My companion nipped into another marquee for a drink. An even bigger cheer went up. A Shaw Lane equaliser? No. All became clear. I’d missed (possibly) the highlight of the game – Mellis had only earned himself a penalty, then missed it. Obviously SHOUTY Stags’ manager Steve Evans hadn’t kept abreast of the latest research, showing a penalty is less likely to be scored by a player who’d won said pen (‘Outside the Box’, by Duncan Alexander).

Close to the action at San Sheerian.

Getting back to my place on the terrace, the game was decided by ex-Red coulda-been Danny Rose. First, he got up above the centre half to head home (not bad for a midget) before delivering the coup de grace….a scissor kick volley from 10 yards. Not a bad way to return to the town he still lives in, and later voted goal of the round. 1-3, done and dusted, much of the home crowd headed to the exit. After our starter, it was time for the main course…and a bus back to Barnsley town centre which didn’t get me to Oakwell in time for kick-off (booo) but did get me there in time to see the Super Reds take a 2nd minute lead. Today was going to be a good day.

Mansfield celebrate the winner.

The Damage:
£10 ent
£1.50 prog
£2.50 pie and peas and gravy
£3.50 bus (A ‘Dayrrider’)
= £17.50

The Tunes:
The Dawn of Psychedelia (Various)


Shaw Lane v Mansfield panorama.

1st sighting of ground...sort of.

No mistaking which way now.

Understated ground sign on a house like my nana used to live in.

Fans entering the ground.

Never forget whose ground it actually is.

Club shop (closed).

The Main Stand?  Well, only one with seats in.

The usual press box.  Capacity: 2.

Will he / won't he deal with it?

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